Right now I want my boyfriend, icecream, and a big blanket.
When I see your posts on tumblr, sometimes, I want to text you or reply to your posts or go to your house because you seem so sad and I want to be there for you but we both haven’t talked in forever an you definitely don’t want my help.
A few months ago I would have told people I was happy. Now that I look back on then I’m realizing I wasn’t.
I was having anxiety attacks all the time, I was going through family shit and was dealing with something for way to long.
I said I was happy because I wanted to be and I figured if I said I was I would eventually become genuinely happy.
Today I can say I am genuinely happy. This is no thanks to the faking and lieing to myself.
It because of the simple fact I came to my senses and changed.
And I am so happy I did.
My boyfriend and his sister, who is in college, were talking about writing papers for school and she said he can’t complain because she had to write a twelve page paper on happiness. The more I thought about it through the night the more it bugged me. You can’t really define it.
She gave us examples of how sex, money, and food can make us happy but I think everyone feels it differently. I mean don’t get me wrong sex, food and money are all great.
I don’t really know where I’m going with this but I am just so happy now. I have an amazing boyfriend, family stuff is slowing down, and my friends are the best.